We talk too much

That’s the gist of Thabiti’s post on “Too Many Words” which begins like this:

“When words are many, transgression is not lacking, but whoever restrains his lips is prudent” (Prov. 10:19).

“Be not rash with your mouth, nor let your heart be hasty to utter a word before God, for God is in heaven and you are on earth. Therefore let your words be few. For a dream comes with much business, and a fool’s voice with many words.  … Let not your mouth lead you into sin, and do not say before the messenger that it was a mistake. Why should God be angry at your voice and destroy the work of your hands? For when dreams increase and words grow many, there is vanity; but God is the one you must fear” (Eccl. 5:2-3, 6-7).

“Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God” (James 1:19-20).

“Whoever restrains his words has knowledge,
and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding” (Prov. 17:27)

“Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits”(Prov. 18:21).

“How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire! And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell. For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God. From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so. Does a spring pour forth from the same opening both fresh and salt water? Can a fig tree, my brothers, bear olives, or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a salt pond yield fresh water” (James 3:5b-12).

The Most Wise God’s best wisdom is “Be quiet.”  God speaks often of our need to be quiet.  Can there be any doubt that too many of us talk too much?  I know I do.  So I need this admonishment from the living word of God.  And as I survey the blogosphere today, I feel a deep sadness.  For I am a man of unclean lips who blogs among a people of unclean lips.  Not only unclean but constantly moving.

To be more precise, the lips don’t concern me.  The hearts do.  For out of the abundance of the heart, our mouths speak.

I think Thabiti is on to something here and he continues on clearly making his case for talking less! Keep reading

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Help my words–a prayer for gracious speech

Every week in my discipleship accountability group I am asked this question:  ”Has your speech followed the guidelines of Ephesians 4:29 (wholesome, helpful, affirming, aware of what’s needful, beneficial, full of grace)?  That’s a good question to contemplate and a great standard to evaluate your words by.  I can’t obey this command on my own.  It is not just enough to try harder or to be be better.  Flesh will never accomplish this.  I must live by the Spirit. I must express my need to God and ask for His divine assistance. And I know that if I ask anything according to His will, He hears.

Scotty Smith expresses this request, “Lord, help me to speak healthy, needful, grace filled words” in this helpful prayer based on Proverbs 12:18, “Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing”.

ear Lord Jesus, I love words. I especially love the way you use words to bring me healing… wisdom… joy… encouragement… freedom… and hope. You will never shame me with words. You will never manipulate me with words. You will never hurt me with words. You alone have the words of life…

My prayer is so simple today, yet so necessary. Grant me greater stewardship of my words. Jesus, as you speak to me, please speak through me. It’s humbling to realize that you, who created the world with words, are pleased to bring healing to others through my mouth. It’s equally scary to realize I’m am capable of bringing a lot of decay and destruction by the same mouth.

Every day, in every conversation, I prove the reality of the proverb which teaches that words have the power of life and death (Prov. 18:21) I also remember you teaching me that my words are simply a reflection of what is filling my heart. Indeed, “The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks.” (Luke 6:45)

SO, rather than just ratcheting up some will power to have done with all drivel, reckless words, gossip, flattery, inanity, irritation, coarse jesting, excuse-making, confidence-breaking, too many words, and many more expressions of death-speak… Jesus, fill my heart with your beauty and bounty.

So fill my heart with the truth, goodness and riches of the gospel that… more often than not… the first and greater percentage of syllables out of my mouth will bring healing, not harm. May my mouth overflow with words season with grace because my heart has been more fully filled with your grace. So very Amen, I pray, in your name and for your glory.

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The Word that can change your tongue

The reason our speech gets us into trouble has little to do with the tongue. We sin in our speech because we are sinners by nature who don’t properly fear God. Before your speech patterns can be changed, your heart must be transformed.” How can that happen?  Pastor Jim Newheiser explains,

One of the names of Jesus is ‘the Word’ (John 1:1; see also Prov. 8:6–7). He is the perfect and final revelation from God. When on earth, he was the master of wise speech. Never once did he flatter, lie, gossip, or speak with sinful anger. Even when people tried to entrap or provoke him, ‘while being reviled, He did not revile in return … but kept entrusting Himself to Him who judges righteously’ (1 Peter 2:23). Every word Jesus spoke was true. Out of his mouth flowed wisdom (10:31a; John 7:38). His wise words continue to build up and give life to those who listen (John 6:63). Just as in Proverbs a sagacious king teaches wisdom to his people, King Jesus teaches you how to become wise and speak well. Ask God for wisdom through Christ, and he will answer abundantly.

The good news is that the one and only God, who is holy, made us in his image to know Him. Part of his image was speech and language.  God communicates His law to us and we were designed to be in relationship with Him.  The first man and woman walked with God in the Garden.   But we sinned and cut ourselves off from him.  In His great love, God became a man in Jesus, lived a perfect life, and died on the cross, thus fulfilling the law Himself and taking on Himself the punishment for the sins of all those who would ever turn and trust in Him.  He rose again from the dead, showing that God accepted Christ’s sacrifice and that God’s wrath against us had been exhausted.  He now calls us to repent of our sins and to trust in Christ alone for the forgiveness of our sins.  If we repent of our sin and trust in Christ, we are born again into a new life, an eternal life with God.  Will you call on Christ today to save you?  It is your only hope of everlasting life.  Once you die, you have no second chance.

We have no righteous to offer God, but He offers us the righteousness of His Son, Jesus Christ.  When we repent and trust Christ we become righteous and are reconciled to God.  And God redeems our mouth so that   “The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life.” (Proverbs 10:11). Until that time, “Doing wrong is like a joke to a fool.” (Proverbs 10:23). We can’t speak good out of our evil hearts.

But when God saves we “will keep our hearts with all vigilance, for from it flows the springs of life.”  (Proverbs 4:23).

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Wise words (2)

Words are amazing, aren’t they? Yesterday as I preached about biblical wisdom for our words, I began by just noting four simple observations about words.  You can read or listen to the whole message.

●    Words are an incredible gift from God (Proverbs 4:22; 10:11, 20, 21)
Think about the gift of the tongue, the gift of speech, the gift of language.  its so natural that we forget it is a a gift from God. Indeed, it is part of the image of God.  God spoke to Adam, Adam spoke with Eve, Adam named all the animals and gave a perfect title to his wife, Satan used communication to persuade Eve and Eve to invite Adam to eat.   And that is all just in the Garden of Eden.

Think of the amazing qualities of the tongue.  The tongue can bring healing.   “My son, be attentive to my words; incline your ear to my sayings. Let them not escape from your sight; keep them within your heart. For they are life to those who find them, and healing to all their flesh.” (Proverbs 4:20-22). The tongue serves as refreshing water.   “The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life, but the mouth of the wicked conceals violence.” (Proverbs 10:11).  The tongue is like precious metal “The tongue of the righteous is choice silver; the heart of the wicked is of little worth.” (Proverbs 10:20). The tongue gives nourishing and life-giving food.   “The lips of the righteous feed many, but fools die for lack of sense.” (Proverbs 10:21).

●    Words can be used for good
This all points to the truth that the tongue can be used for good.  We will look at this more in depth later in the message. Tongues can bring peace, restore brokenness, instruct, rescue, encourage, deliver, give hope, and lift up.

●    Words can be used for evil
Sadly tongues can be used for evil.  The same tongue on the same day in the same conversation can be used for both for good and evil.  “From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be.” (James 3:10).

A suicide’s body was found floating in a river and a note was written on her person. The note had only two words written on it: “They said.” Do we realize what a word from our tongues can do? It can wreck a local church, mar a child for life, disrupt the harmony of a business office and destroy a marriage.

Oh, my friends, there is so much concern about international terrorism in the world today―about weapons of mass destruction.  We should rightly be concerned about international peace and our national security. But I have something that concerns my heart even more―I am concerned about something that each one of us has within us―a weapon of crass destruction―our tongues.

In recent years, there has been much concern about violence in the workplace, violence in public setting, so that in many public buildings today you have to go through metal detectors.  But I wonder this morning, how many of us, if we had to have walked through “a tongue detector” before entering the sanctuary this morning―a detector that would have revealed all the words we spoke this week―how many of us would be mortified to have others discover the violence we did with our tongues.

Why is there so much devastation in our speech?  Why did we wage war on another human being, many times those we love, this week?  Why? You know there is so much talk today about gun violence.  You read headlines “Guns kill!” We hear it so often we forget that guns don’t kill people.  People kill!  And along the same lines, it is not our tongues that are inherently evil. It is our hearts!  Jesus in unusual clarity declares, “How can you speak good, when you are evil? For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. The good person out of his good treasure brings forth good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure brings forth evil. I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak,” (Matthew 12:34-36).

●    Only God can help us with our words
This seems indeed to be bad news.  Our hearts are deceitful and above all things desperately wicked. Who can know them?  And so areour tongues!  But as we will learn this morning as well―there is hope for our tongues. And that hope lies in a changed heart―a heart that is transformed by the grace of God and by the love of Christ.  More on this later, but my point right now is only God can ultimately help us with our words.  No speech therapist, no 12-step program, and no anger management group can give lasting hope!  But God can and the gospel can.  Until we realize this, we will go on sinning with our tongues: lying, gossiping, slandering, speaking before we think, and talking too much.

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Wise words

A judge speaks some words and the guilty defendant is taken off to his jail cell to start serving his sentence.  The President of the United States speak and his words reverberate around the world. The Federal Reserve Chairman or Warren Buffet speaks and stock markets around the world react.  A gossip makes a phone call and reputations are blemished or perhaps ruined.  One angry rant by a friend or a loved and a relationship that enjoyed years of joy is greatly impacted.  A skeptical professor makes a snide remark in a lecture and a student’s faith is destroyed.

James reminds us the tongue is ravaging fire, a dangerous animal, and a deadly poison.  Solomon spoke wisely and truly, “”Death and life are in the power of the tongue.” (Proverbs 18:21).

When it comes to living wisely in a broken world, there is no other subject that requires more biblical wisdom than our speech.  God desires that we speak wise words.  Foolish words are one of the top contributors to our broken, messed up world.  We speak an average of 15,00 words a day, not to mention all the words we “speak” today through email, blogging, Facebook,  and texting.

“It has been estimated that from the first “good morning” to the last “good night,” the average person engages in 30 conversations a day; some of you average more than that, some of you, less.  Statisticians have estimated that each of us will spend 13 years of our life talking, and every day, our words could write a book of 50-60 pages. In a year, if we are just average, we could author 264 books of over 200 pages, just with our words. You can do more than that if you can speak in excess of 300 words per minute, as some of us are able to do, or if you talk incessantly at any speed,” writes John MacArthur.

Proverbs recognizes how important our words, addressing our speech approximately  150 times in 915 verses. That’s  about 16% of the entire book.  There is  more teaching in the book of Proverbs on the use of the tongue than any other subject.

When it comes to living in this broken world, we need to choose wise words over foolish words.  Foolish words bring incredible brokenness. “A babbling fool will come to ruin.” (Proverbs 10:10). “A fool’s mouth is his ruin, and his lips are a snare to his soul.” (Proverbs 18:7). “An evil man is ensnared by the transgression of his lips.” (Proverbs 12:13). So much in this broken world is caused by our communication. And yet there is also much power for restoration in the tongue.  “There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.” (Proverbs 12:18).

I will be blogging this week each day about the power of words.  I preached on this theme today and you can read or listen to the message.

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Proverbs on listening and speaking (pt. 1)

“Let the wise hear and increase in learning, and the one who understands obtain guidance, to understand a proverb and a saying, the words of the wise and their riddles.” (Proverbs 1:5-6, ESV).

” Hear, my son, your father’s instruction, and forsake not your mother’s teaching,” (Proverbs 1:8, ESV).

” My son, if you receive my words and treasure up my commandments with you, making your ear attentive to wisdom and inclining your heart to understanding;” (Proverbs 2:1-2, ESV).

“For the Lord gives wisdom; from his mouth come knowledge and understanding;” (Proverbs 2:6, ESV).

“So you will be delivered from the forbidden woman, from the adulteress with her smooth words,” (Proverbs 2:16, ESV).

” Hear, O sons, a father’s instruction, and be attentive, that you may gain insight,” (Proverbs 4:1, ESV).

“Hear, my son, and accept my words, that the years of your life may be many.” (Proverbs 4:10, ESV).

“My son, be attentive to my words; incline your ear to my sayings.” (Proverbs 4:20, ESV).

“Put away from you crooked speech, and put devious talk far from you.” (Proverbs 4:24, ESV).

” My son, be attentive to my wisdom; incline your ear to my understanding, that you may keep discretion, and your lips may guard knowledge.” (Proverbs 5:1-2, ESV).

“For the lips of a forbidden woman drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil,” (Proverbs 5:3, ESV).

“And now, O sons, listen to me, and do not depart from the words of my mouth.” (Proverbs 5:7, ESV).

“I did not listen to the voice of my teachers or incline my ear to my instructors. I am at the brink of utter ruin in the assembled congregation.”” (Proverbs 5:13-14, ESV).

“if you are snared in the words of your mouth, caught in the words of your mouth,” (Proverbs 6:2, ESV).

“A worthless person, a wicked man, goes about with crooked speech,” (Proverbs 6:12, ESV).

“haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood,” (Proverbs 6:17, ESV).

“a false witness who breathes out lies, and one who sows discord among brothers.” (Proverbs 6:19, ESV).

“to preserve you from the evil woman, from the smooth tongue of the adulteress.” (Proverbs 6:24, ESV).

” My son, keep my words and treasure up my commandments with you;” (Proverbs 7:1, ESV).

“to keep you from the forbidden woman, from the adulteress with her smooth words.” (Proverbs 7:5, ESV).

“With much seductive speech she persuades him; with her smooth talk she compels him.” (Proverbs 7:21, ESV).

“And now, O sons, listen to me, and be attentive to the words of my mouth.” (Proverbs 7:24, ESV).

“Hear, for I will speak noble things, and from my lips will come what is right, for my mouth will utter truth; wickedness is an abomination to my lips. All the words of my mouth are righteous; there is nothing twisted or crooked in them.” (Proverbs 8:6-8, ESV).

“The fear of the Lord is hatred of evil. Pride and arrogance and the way of evil and perverted speech I hate.” (Proverbs 8:13, ESV).

““And now, O sons, listen to me: blessed are those who keep my ways.” (Proverbs 8:32, ESV).

“Blessings are on the head of the righteous, but the mouth of the wicked conceals violence.” (Proverbs 10:6, ESV).

“The wise of heart will receive commandments, but a babbling fool will come to ruin.” (Proverbs 10:8, ESV).

“Whoever winks the eye causes trouble, but a babbling fool will come to ruin.” (Proverbs 10:10, ESV).

“The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life, but the mouth of the wicked conceals violence.” (Proverbs 10:11, ESV).

“On the lips of him who has understanding, wisdom is found, but a rod is for the back of him who lacks sense.” (Proverbs 10:13, ESV).

“The wise lay up knowledge, but the mouth of a fool brings ruin near.” (Proverbs 10:14, ESV).

“The one who conceals hatred has lying lips, and whoever utters slander is a fool. When words are many, transgression is not lacking, but whoever restrains his lips is prudent. The tongue of the righteous is choice silver; the heart of the wicked is of little worth. The lips of the righteous feed many, but fools die for lack of sense.” (Proverbs 10:18-21, ESV).

“The mouth of the righteous brings forth wisdom, but the perverse tongue will be cut off. The lips of the righteous know what is acceptable, but the mouth of the wicked, what is perverse.” (Proverbs 10:31-32, ESV).

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